The birth siblings of my youngest adopted daughter are coming to live with me for an unknown amount of time. All I can think of are the “what ifs” at the end of this journey. What if I have to give them back….. What if I get to keep them…… How will this affect the children( the 4 that I already have plus the 2 new ones)....... How will this affect my marriage…….. How will this affect my sanity? There are many more “what ifs”, but I think you get the picture!
What I have realized is that I can continue to consume my thoughts with what may happen in the future, or I can trust that God already knows and consume my thoughts with His goodness and His sovereignty in already having the details and the “what ifs” worked out – for my good and for the good of the children! After all, He is the perfect Parent and His ways are higher than our ways. We don’t always get to know the details, but we are blessed to be included in His plans!
I am not sure how this will end, but for the time being, I will be everything I can be to these precious little ones while they are in my safe keeping. I will introduce them to Jesus for the first time and tell them how much He loves them. I will nurture and care for them in a way I could never imagine outside the grace of God. For it is ONLY by God’s grace that I can endure this mountain in front of me. It seems so high and so wide that there is no way to see what is on the other side. The comfort is in knowing that God sees the end from the beginning and that He is already on the other side waiting for me as I take each step in complete faith in HIM, not in my ability to “manage” this, and not in my own strength. For it is in my weakness that His power is made perfect (2 Corinthians 12:9).
I don’t know what to expect on this journey, but I am confident that at the end of it, I will be stronger and closer to the One that gives me life and strength in order to see this through. Blessings, Wendi